Every door I knock on is mostly bad news
Most cars I stop, I don’t plan on giving a ticket
It’s either to tell them to slow down
or tell them their taillight is out
When I go order a meal
I try to go to places where
I see my food being made
When I eat, my back is to the wall
Head on a swivel,
Is my food poisoned?
Spit on?
Was this the restaurant
where that pedophile worked I arrested?
I constantly scan for threats,
whether going to a call
Driving on the road,
or even stopped taking a quick lunch
break in my car,
Constant 911 calls,
Domestic Violence,
The wife who called 911 is now fighting
My partner and I because
She doesn’t want her abusive spouse to go to jail
Murders,
The smell hits you,
You try to keep your composure
Child Abuse,
God, I want to punch this
fuck in the face
Fatal accidents,
Notify of parents
their child is no longer here
Heart Attacks,
CPR, C’mon man breathe!
Elder Abuse,
Rape in progress,
I hope to God
I get there to get this sick fuck
Shooting in progress,
Lock and load, put on my SWAT kit, armed barricade
Active break ins,
Random scream in the night,
Adrenaline is pumping
Tones going off in your car,
Dispatch frantic “clear the air”
Officer in trouble,
Shit I just spoke to him a minute ago,
I go home at the end of the night,
Take a deep breath,
My family has its needs,
Bills to pay,
Mouths to feed,
My son/daughter want to play,
I feel distant, I need a minute,
Head to bed, can’t sleep
Do it all over again tomorrow,
_____________________
This first appeared in The Havok Journal on June 22, 2020.
Ayman is an Army Veteran who was deployed during Operation Iraqi Freedom in 2005 and became a police officer in 2007 after 8 years of military service. He has worked in the patrol division, in a plainclothes anti-crime unit, as a Metro-SWAT operator, and as a detective in a major crimes unit, as a narcotics task force detective with the DEA, and as an operator with the DEA Special Response Team (SRT). He also helped organize SRT operations in Southern New England.
As an assistant team leader, he assisted and coordinated the planning of operations as well as conducted various aspects of training. He has investigated high-level drug traffickers, gang members, and conducted numerous operations. He is currently the Officer in Charge of the Problem-Oriented Policing Unit. Ayman is a law enforcement firearms instructor, a less-than-lethal weapons instructor, a certified use of force instructor at his police department Ayman’s hands-on experience with law enforcement operations at many different levels coupled with his compassion to save lives has brought him to coordinate “Project Sapient.”
This initiative is a joint effort comprised of law enforcement professionals of all levels combined with the Special Forces philosophy of winning hearts and minds. Ayman has found that to reach more officers and departments, it is important to share his experience with media outlets that reach law enforcement.
He regularly contributes to The Havok Journal, writing articles that provide insight into current law enforcement trends and methodologies to help officers become better equipped to handle an ever-changing work environment.
Project Sapient is currently a Podcast. Ayman’s vision of Project Sapient is to eventually train other law enforcement officers and civilians alike in stress inoculation. Something that is sorely needed in the Law Enforcement profession. In his writing, Ayman draws from his hands-on experience as both a law enforcement professional and his military service.
For years, Ayman has seen the trend in lack of training policing. Whether it’s budget cuts, political enemies, or ineffective policy, Ayman has made it his mission to bring innovation, unconventional policing methods, and to have those tough conversations and instruction to assist law enforcement to better relate with and advise communities.
He sees firsthand the need for better training and tools for law enforcement to serve their communities most effectively. A better-trained officer is what policing a free society requires.
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