If you are contemplating suicide, please just spend a few minutes considering what I’m about to say because I’m going to keep this short and to the point.
Most people who commit suicide, or are considering it, rationalize that their loved ones and friends will be better off without them. This reasoning is one hundred percent wrong! Talk to anyone left behind and they will tell you that their lives are worse because of the loss of that family member or friend.
Those with ideations of suicide also often believe that the pain of loss will get easier over time and that eventually the hole gets filled in. Again, one hundred percent wrong! Ask anyone who has suffered a suicide loss if it gets better with time. They won’t even hesitate to answer with a resounding “No! It never gets better!”
Your suicide will cause permanent pain and emotional scarring to those who love you. Do you want to do that to them?
And think about the fact that someone will find your dead body–perhaps all swollen, purple, and bloated. Or with half your head missing and your brains all over the wall. Do you want a family member to have that image burned into their brains for the rest of their lives? My nephew found his mom that way when he was six. She hanged herself in the shower. He will never be the same again.
Even if it’s not family or friends who find you, do you want EMS or Law Enforcement folks to have to carry the image with them? They are human too and it impacts them deeply. Sometimes it becomes too much, and they commit suicide. Is that something you want?
I speak from experience. I’ve been suicidal on numerous occasions. Wanna’ know the main thing that stopped me? It was the images of the irreparable and permanent sorrow and pain that it would cause my family. My children having to explain to my grandchildren that their Pops is gone because he killed himself. My parents having to endure the loss of another son, except this one was suicide and not untreatable leukemia. The pain to my wife who prayed to God for a good husband who is now gone by his own hand.
Listen, I know it’s hard. But heroes do the hard things. Get help. At the very least for the sake of those you love, who also love you. They want to help. Let them. Reach out and don’t push them away.
Just remember. Life won’t get better for them if you are gone. It will get worse and they will never get over it.
Editor’s Note: 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: The 988 Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States.
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This first appeared in The Havok Journal on September 9, 2022.
Dave Chamberlin served 38 years in the USAF and Air National Guard as an aircraft crew chief, where he retired as a CMSgt. He has held a wide variety of technical, instructor, consultant, and leadership positions in his more than 40 years of civilian and military aviation experience. Dave holds an FAA Airframe and Powerplant license from the FAA, as well as a Master’s degree in Aeronautical Science. He currently runs his own consulting and training company and has written for numerous trade publications.
His true passion is exploring and writing about issues facing the military, and in particular, aircraft maintenance personnel.
As the Voice of the Veteran Community, The Havok Journal seeks to publish a variety of perspectives on a number of sensitive subjects. Unless specifically noted otherwise, nothing we publish is an official point of view of The Havok Journal or any part of the U.S. government.
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