Fan Mail Friday • The Havok Journal

What you think about what we write is important to us. So every Friday, we’re going to publish, and in some cases provide commentary on, some of the emails we received and some of the comments that got posted on Facebook and or the Havok Journal site. The purpose of this is for us to respond to some of your compliments and criticism, and to let you know we’re listening. We can’t always respond to every email and every comment on our articles, but we try.

Love us or hate us, we want to hear from you. As always, feel free to hit us up on Facebook or at the email at the bottom of this article if you have a story idea, article feedback, or a piece of your own that you think we’d like to publish.

Thank you for taking the time to read our work, and to make your own commentary. That helps make Havok Journal a venue for two-way communication, and therefore true learning.

We announced a few weeks back that we were starting the #NotAllVeterans campaign, and warned that we were going to be writing about some pretty controversial issues in the near future. True to our word, we have since talked about issues such as U.S. support of Israel, the National Guard, and the very complex issue of veteran suicides. It is the last issue, suicide, which generated the majority of fan feedback recently.

Below are three emails we received regarding articles we posted over the last couple of weeks. You’re welcome to leave your comments as well. Happy Friday, remember everyone deployed.

I felt the need to write to you regarding depression and suicide. I know
very few people who are in the military, so hearing about veteran suicide
is always hard since I feel so cut off from being able to help them. But
I know what constant depression feels like, so I wrote down some thoughts.

You go dead inside, waiting for something to revive you, waiting for
something to make you come alive again. And you wait and wait. And
sometimes something helps. But it gets swallowed up by the dreaded
thoughts. Victories seem few and far between, which seems to spell
failure.

Victory is hard to achieve when you are beaten to a pulp. Being
emotionally beaten to a pulp isn’t very different.

Your heart is sick and it is hard!
Hope doesn’t seem to be coming. And it hurts.
When will your heart ever be cheerful again?

But what if after battering yourself with self-hatred and hopelessness,
someone said, “I love you”?
And what if for every dark thought you had, someone had something kind to
say to you personally?

These are my words to all of you who are hurting.

I want to help you. I don’t want to see you in pain. I don’t want you to
suffer. I don’t know the answers for how you will come through it, but I
don’t want you to hurt. I don’t want you to be alone. I want you to find
hope again, however long it takes.

You aren’t a failure. You aren’t worthless. You aren’t rejected. You
aren’t abandoned.

I don’t want you to give up.
I don’t want you to die.
I need you to stay here.

I might never meet you in person, but I still care about you.
I feel inadequate about what to say since you have been through so much
more than me, but I don’t want you to suffer alone. I want you to find
healing.

You are my countrymen and I love you.

I read your article on Vets and suicide. I just want to say that I have been there. I am a former SEAL Team Operator who has spent a lot of time in harm’s way. I have struggled and still do struggle with depression. It has led to alcohol and drug issues that almost cost me, my family. I am sober now and being treated for the depression, but I still think that at times, I’m one bad day from ending my life. I too had a gun to my head and lacked the courage to complete the mission. I haven’t done it, mainly because I love my children and because I’m afraid of Hell. I take it a day at a time and I spend some time and effort on my faith and really trying to understand God and why I’m here.

I’m reaching out not for your pity, but because I want you to know that I really appreciate you taking the time to tell us your story and remind us that there are good men out there who risked their lives for their country. Who has seen things that have changed their lives forever. Guys who just can’t figure out how to find peace in this world. All of these guys who are out there and feeling like they can’t go on need to know that there are many of us who think of them and who pray for their peace.

Howdy. I recently read your article titled “Not All Veterans Support Israel” and felt compelled to thank you for sharing your views. I shared your post with my spouse who, like myself, is a veteran. We enjoyed your piece and share a similar sentiment. Please accept this written gratitude in lieu of the shot of Jameson and fist bump that we feel you merit. Thank you, Scott. My wife and I sincerely look forward to reading more of your work.

havokjournal@havokmedia.com