If you served in the military no matter what branch of service you were in, you learned at some point the importance of having space to maneuver. Whether you were maneuvering pairs of boots, a tank, a ship, or a fighter jet, having adequate physical space was essential to executing maneuver smoothly and safely. Likewise, when we encounter challenges in life, our minds need maneuver space to mentally negotiate difficult moments. This series will highlight each month a different brief cognitive tool that you can use in your daily life to potentially create more maneuver space. Remember having maneuver space, or space to think, is a gift in life. Once you create it, use it to your advantage!
Stuck Points
At some point in the military, you likely got something suck. A vehicle, a ship, a tank, an aircraft, or maybe you own two boots. When we get stuck, it can quickly become very frustrating, maybe even hopeless. But quitting won’t get that vehicle, tank, or boots out of the mud. You must slowly rock back and forth in order to effect change and break free. Sometimes in life, our minds get stuck. Stuck points in our minds often present themselves as overly rigid or inflexible beliefs. When this happens, we cannot adapt easily to new information. Stuck points create an environment in our minds, like the vehicle or tank stuck in the mud, that may even feel hopeless. They are a thief of mental maneuver space. “Stuck points are often beliefs about yourself, others, or the world that in general are potentially exaggerated, often negative, and not 100% accurate.”[1] In order to challenge stuck points in our minds, we first must learn to differentiate what is and what is not a stuck point. Then we can discover ways to potentially get unstuck.
What IS a Stuck Point?[2]
- Thoughts that are not 100% accurate
- ‘I am a bad person’, ‘I am a failure’, ‘I am unlovable’, ‘I am worthless’
- Thoughts about your understanding about why something happened
- ‘It is my fault the accident happened’, ‘Because I did not fight, the abuse is my fault’, “If I let myself think about what happened, I will never get it out of my mind’
- Thoughts about yourself, others, or the world that changed dramatically because something happened
- ‘If I let other people get close to me, I’ll get hurt again’, ‘No civilians can understand me’, ‘The government cannot be trusted’
- Beliefs sometimes formatted in an ‘If…then’ structure
- ‘If I had been paying attention, then nobody would have been hurt’, ‘If I have a happy life, then I will be dishonoring my friends’
- Often has language that is extreme, all or nothing, or black & white.
- ‘I am never happy’, ‘Leaders always lie’, ‘I must be on guard at all times’
What IS NOT a Stuck Point?[3]
- Behaviors
- ‘I fight with my daughter all the time’. This describes a behavior and therefore cannot be a stuck point. Consider instead what thoughts you have when fighting.
- Feelings
- ‘I am nervous when I go out on a date’. This cannot be a stuck point because it describes and emotion. Consider instead what you are telling yourself that is making you feel a certain way.
- Facts
- ‘I witnessed people die in war’ This cannot be a stuck point because it may be something that actually happened. Instead, consider what thoughts you had as this happened and what you think about it now.
- Questions
- ‘What will happen to me?’ This is a question and cannot be stuck point. Consider instead what the answer to your question is.
- One Word Statements
- ‘Trust’ cannot be a stuck point in itself. Example: Ask yourself what cannot be trusted.
- Moral Statements
- ‘The military should take care of its Soldiers’, cannot be a stuck point because it reflects a standard of behavior. Instead, consider how a statement pertains to you specifically.
Ways to Get Unstuck
Stuck points are often related to self-blame for a chaotic or potentially traumatic event. To clear up a stuck point, identify and challenge the belief. To challenge a belief is not to deny the event happened, but rather to see the whole picture of what occurred.
- First, think about what is keeping you stuck? [4]
- Negative Thoughts, Negative Emotions (anxiety, depression), disorganization, forgetfulness, lack of time, other people, local/national/world events & news, habit of thinking (Because I have always felt this way then it must be true)
- Go Through the Problem-Solving Steps[5]
- Identify the problem and your goal. Ask yourself: ‘What do I want?’, ‘What is getting in the way?’, ‘What would make me feel better?’
- Brainstorm ways to accomplish your goals. Come up with as many solutions as you can even if they don’t seem realistic
- Evaluate the pros and the cons of each solution.
- Break down each solution into small, concrete, achievable steps.
- Evaluate your success. If you are not where you want to be, try again.
- What evidence shows this is absolutely 100% true? Ask yourself, if you had to stand before a judge and jury, would there be holes in your story?
- Identify your belief and the emotions that the belief drives. How do you feel when you have this thought?
As we have discussed, stuck points make it difficult to create maneuver space in our minds. They create potentially overly rigid or inflexible beliefs. These beliefs might have served a purpose at one time as they helped us deal with painful memories, made us feel safe, or brought us some sense of closure. However, these beliefs or stuck points are counterproductive when they cause us to have difficult emotions or reactions that impact our quality of life. Learn to identify your stuck points, challenge them, and just like you got that vehicle, tank, or boots out of the mud, GET UNSTUCK!
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About the Author: Mr. Bongioanni is a licensed mental health counselor who also works for the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. He is also a senior leader in the U.S. Army Reserve. His professional interests include human behavior, applied psychology, and military cultural competence. The views expressed are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, the U.S. Department of Defense, or the U.S. Government.
[1] U.S. Army Directorate of Prevention, Resilience, and Readiness. (2023, June 10). Identifying and Overcoming Stuck Points. https://www.armyresilience.army.mil/ard/R2/Challenge-Stuck-Points.html
[2] Resick, P. A., Monson, C. M., & Chard, K. M. (2014). Cognitive processing therapy: Veteran/military version: Therapist and patient materials manual. Washington, DC: Department of Veterans Affairs. B25-B26.
[3] Resick, P. A., et al., 2014. B25-B26.
[4] Sullivan, N. & McAndrew, L. (2022) 2022 WRIISC-HOME Webinar Series: Lecture 11. “WRIISC-HOME Health Coaching for Veterans with Complex Pain”, VA Office of Patient Care Services, War Related Illness, and Injury Study Center, Health Outcomes Military Exposures, 55.
[5] Sullivan, N., et al., 2022. 56.
Check out past issues of Maneuver Space below:
Maneuver Space: Volume 1, Issue 1
Maneuver Space: Volume 1, Issue 2
Maneuver Space: Volume 1, Issue 3
Maneuver Space: Volume 1, Issue 4
Maneuver Space: Volume 1, Issue 5
Manuever Space: Volume 1, Issue 6
As the Voice of the Veteran Community, The Havok Journal seeks to publish a variety of perspectives on a number of sensitive subjects. Unless specifically noted otherwise, nothing we publish is an official point of view of The Havok Journal or any part of the U.S. government.
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