There is nothing, and I mean nothing, more spiritually moving than watching 357 members of Congress sprint together to bury sexual misconduct Continue Reading
satire/humor
The Alliance of Cowards
There is nothing quite as moving as the modern Western alliance in action, if by “in action” you mean standing in a tasteful semicircle, issuing Continue Reading
Signed for the slogan, invoiced for the consequences.
Last April, I looked at Iran’s eternal stadium chant of “Death to America” and reframed it as the geopolitical equivalent of a gym bro screaming “YOU Continue Reading
BREAKING: USA Hockey Does What Canada Couldn’t — Outscore, Out-Last, and Out-Politic the Canadians
By Hugh Jashol, Article 107 News*Article 107 News — Because Someone Has to Keep Score In a stunning twist that has NHL fans, diplomats, and Continue Reading
Europe’s Security Subscription Just Went Full Price Under Trump
Europe has two religions: Symbolism and Someone Else Paying For It. So when Donald Trump waddles onto the world stage and starts yanking the Continue Reading
California’s Homelessness Money Cannon Still Can’t Hit a Target
California has a special talent. Not Silicon Valley “invent a future” talent. Not Hollywood “manufacture a reality” talent. I mean the rarer gift: the Continue Reading
Florida Cold Snap Triggers Emergency Response for Falling Iguanas
By Untactic Al Florida officials confirmed this week that an unexpected cold snap has caused thousands of iguanas to temporarily lose their grip on Continue Reading
Shanghai Strings and the American Press Puppet Show
If you want to understand what’s happening in the United States, stop staring at the crowd shots and start staring at the wiring diagram. The chanting Continue Reading
For Marines, Gear Adrift Is “Gear a-Gift”
By Hugh Jashol, for Article 107 News* There are many immutable laws in the universe. Gravity pulls downward. The sun rises in the east. And if a Continue Reading
Nuance Is Dead and the Algorithm Ate the Body
Vincent Vargas’ essay, “The Cost of Inaccuracy,” pulls off a modern miracle: holding two thoughts at once without snapping a moral tendon. He argues Continue Reading
Greenland Launches Pre-Emptive Strike Against the U.S. With… Weather?
By Hugh Jashol, Article 107 News* In an unprecedented act of meteorological hostility, the Government of Greenland has officially declared war on Continue Reading
A Cop’s Guide to Brain Surgery
Editor's Note: Yes, we have to say this: the “medical advice” in this piece is satire. Do not attempt any of it, unless your long-term plan involves a Continue Reading