If you’re in the military long enough you’re going to encounter suicide. I showed up at Coast Guard basic training on October 18th, 2010, and signed Continue Reading
The Emotions That Are Eating Us Alive
What comes to mind when you think of psychological therapy? Is it the expensive leather couch, a stuffy-looking doctor with a clipboard, and a quiet Continue Reading
Memorial Day | We’re Human Like Everyone Else
Editor's Note: This is a journal entry written by Havok Journal author, K.C. Aud on May 31, 2015. ______________ I haven’t put much thought into Continue Reading
You’ve Been up for 22 Hours and Haven’t Eaten in 12: Don’t Miss
One thing I think most civilians do not understand about the life of an operational military member, their immediate support units, and first Continue Reading
Life Thirty Minutes at a Time
On a cutter, you’ve always got an eye on the clock. If you stand a watch, which almost everyone does, your days are broken into four-hour chunks; six Continue Reading
For all the relaxing in paradise I could have done… I was eager to return to sea.
2016 10 07 Friday I have often wondered if the people who live in rain forests have a hundred different words for rain. Much like in the movie Continue Reading
Tobacco Musings in Puerto Vallarta
2015 03 29 Sunday I stand on the fantail and stare out at the buildings across the bay from the cutter. We’re moored in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, Continue Reading
Everything Has Become a Threat Assessment
The Following describes K.C. Aud's first day in the shoot house at ME A-School at FLETC written after passing his team's lethal use of force Continue Reading
Why Do I Miss the Bad Times, and What If I Don’t Enjoy What I’m Good At?
Like a nervous farmer a week away from harvesting a bumper crop I woke up at 0200 to check the weather. I was the on-call point of contact for the Continue Reading
The Doric Idiom: Hesma Phobou – “Purging” or “Fear Shedding”
I am not a combat veteran. The closest I’ve come to facing the enemy is holding a rifle or sidearm at high ready when approaching a panga full of Continue Reading
Pascal’s Democracy
There is a philosophical concept called Pascal’s Wager. It’s the idea that we cannot prove God’s existence with math or science, but living like you Continue Reading
Coming Home | I Have No Desire To Die Out Here
We are almost home. Tomorrow I'll kiss my wife and hold onto her like it is the end of the world. The ship has taken on an irregular roll to its Continue Reading